Isn’t it frustrating when you reconnect with a family member or an older family friend after a long time, and the first thing they ask is, “When are you getting married?” or “When will we come to eat rice?” As if that’s the most important thing in your life. They skip right past the essential questions—How are you? How are you managing adult life? How’s your career or business? Do you need any support?—because, frankly, they don’t care.
Instead, they focus on when you’ll fulfill societal expectations by getting married as if marriage is the pinnacle of your existence. It’s almost as if they assume you’ve just been sitting around waiting for your wedding day, rather than navigating the challenges of adulthood, trying to figure out who you are, what you want, and how to become the best version of yourself.
Let’s be real for a second. Asking a woman, “When will you marry?” is not only insensitive; it’s downright rude. It dismisses her personal journey, her ambitions, and even her mental well-being.
Will she marry herself? If she does get married, will these people be there to live through the ups and downs with her? Of course not. Most of them don’t even consider whether she’s mentally or emotionally ready for marriage. It’s just about ticking a box on their societal checklist.
The truth is, many of these “perfect marriages” that people idolize are not as happy as they seem. So why should anyone sacrifice their happiness just to conform to what society or family expects? Don’t get me wrong, happy marriages do exist, and I fully intend to have one myself someday. But the pressure to marry by a certain age is unnecessary and suffocating.
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Give me some space to breathe. I’m trying to figure out my life, build my career, and become somebody. Getting married will be a beautiful addition to my life—but only when I meet the right person, someone I genuinely love and want to spend the rest of my life with. It won’t be because of societal pressure or to satisfy someone else’s expectations.
This isn’t about throwing shade at anyone, but if the shoe fits, well…you know what they say.
Featured Image: The Wedding Party
